All For You
by Emerald Eyed Monster
Summary: Bakura loves Ryou, but Ryou doesnt love him. Bakura wants Ryou to be happy, but there is only one way to do that, and that would hurt Ryou. But Bakura loves him, and would do anything for him. Death is near! slight yaoi and oneshot only! R&R!


okay, i was kind really sad when writing this, so yes, blame me if it sucks. i was also a little high. sorry. way too much sugar. what did you think? i dont do pot anymore...really i dont! anywhoosle, this is kind AU, so dont get mad if it doesn't go by the YGO standerds. okay? good. i think you can guess the pairing, so yeah.

From : Yu-Gi-Oh AU

By : Princess of the Tomb Robbers

Type : Romance/Angst

Pairings : hint of Yami/Ryou/Yuugi Bakura/Ryou

Warning! This is sad and is full of angst, cutting, death, and saddness. You have been warned, so dont flame me saying shit about warnings! Hope youlike it!

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I...

I can't...

I can't do...

I can't do it...

Tell me why! Please, just tell me why I can't die. Why, even though my wrists and throat bleed as much as a river, and I feel sick to my stomache everytime I look at myself in the mirror, and I refuse to eat or drink or even live this pathic life, I still can't fucking die! Why am I still here? What do you get from seeing me suffer like this? Am I only here to feed your sick pleasure? Is that the only reason? Because if that's it, than choose someone else! I want to die! I want to leave this world behind, and leave him here with his friends, I want him to be here and to be happy; because my being here is hurting him, and that's the very last thing I would ever want to do. But yet, no matter how baddly I try, I can't seem to stop hurting him. I hurt him now because no matter how much I hurt myself...

I feel nothing.

And he feels it all.

I am nothing. I can't die, but I can bleed. And he can die, and I don't want him to die, but... it's my only way out. Death is my only escape, even if it won't be my own. I learned a while back, after he found me in the bathtub, sleeping in my own pool of blood, that I cannot die without his death first. That is my only way out. To kill the one I love is the only way to make myself happy. All he wants is to be normal, to be with his friends, to not have me around. He doesn't want to die, but I do. I want to make him happy, I want him to have everything he's ever dreamed of, but I can't give him that. I want him to be the one that I fell in love with the first time I saw him. I want to give him the world.

Is wasn't until later on that I realized he felt nothing for me. He felt for Him, not me. Him being that damned sorry excuse for a Pharaoh. That damned Pharaoh can't show him the love that I can. It's his fault that he must die, for because of him, I got my own body, I was alive again, but he didn't want me to be. He changed after that. He became quiet, more quiet than before, and he locked himself up in his room, playing his music box thing so loud that I couldn't hear him in my own head. Yes, our mind link is still with us. I can talk to him whenever I feel I must, and he can shut and lock the door to his mind whenever he hears my voice in his thoughts. He doesn't want me, and I don't blame him. I'm not at all special, and I never have been. He has the Pharaoh, he doesn't need me, so I will leave.

He's not home right now. He said he was going out, but I knew where. I had gone through his thoughts while he was in the shower, finding out exactly where he was going. He's going to see the Pharaoh, and that stupid brat of his, Yuugi. I don't understands what he sees in them, because all that I see is two damned arses that love to torture me so very much. It's almost midnight, and he still hasn't returned. I have decided, it's for the best I tell you, that I will leave him forever. Tonight was supposed to be our last night, and I was going to make it last and be special, but he has yet to return, so my plan will just have to wait.

I sit here, in my favorite chair; it belongs to him you see, and wait. The tall grandfather clock that he loves so very much chimes in that midnihgt has arrived right on time tonight. I look to the door just as it opens, and see him creeping in, trying not to wake me; as if I would be sleeping right now. He closes the door with a small click and turns to head upstaires to his room, but stops upon seeing me sitting here. He turns on the light; yes, I've been seated here in the dark all along, and looks right at me, his eyes widening at the sight of the knife in my hand. I stand for him, and lead him to his chair, and he shakes at my touch. I smile slightly, a justure that causes him to faulter before taking his place in the chair.

He figures that I will only scold him for getting home so late, but he doesn't have a clue as to what is coming his way. I planned this to be for him, for his pleasure, and now it is for both of ours. I will show him just how much I love him. I raise the knife as I raise my left wrist. I have shown his the scars that I wear, and he cares not of them. He looks up at me with question in his beautiful emerald green eyes. I have yet to answer your questions, my love. I pull up the sleeve of my shirt and show him the most receint cuts and scars, and yet he cares not still. I lay the blade of the beautiful knife against my skin and ran it up my forearm, bringing forth the blood that pumps within my death-defiying veins. He looks onward with yet more questions, and I smile, knowing that he will have only one question to voice tonight. I ran the blade back down, causing more blood from another cut. He still looks on.

He says nothing as I pull off my shirt to show the scars on my chest and my neck. He just sits there like a good little boy, but he is anything but. I ran the blade across my chest in slow cuts, leaving less blood than the times before. I must be running out of my lovely red fluids. He tweeks his head to the side in his cute childish way, and reaches out to touch the scar of his name, written across my heart in bold red letters. His lips quiver slightly as he has just answered one of his own questions. He pulls his hand back quickly and tries to stand, but I force him back down. He is getting confused, I must end this little game of mine soon. I straddle myself over your lap, and lean down to you. Lightly, as lightly as possible, I brush my lips across yours, earning a wonderful gasp of terror and confusion. He tries to push me off his body, but I press to him strongly. I have always been stronger than you, and you the weak one. That's why I love him, you see. Because I am his master, and he is mine. I should be the one he moans for. It should be my name on his lips as he touches himself. It should be my cock inside of him, pounding his sweet little arse into the bed every night. Not that damned Pharaoh. Not that damned brat that follows him everywhere. Me.

I smile down at him and kiss him harder this time, forcing my tongue into his sweet mouth, and I kiss him with every part of my being. He struggles against me, but cannot free himself. You are weak my love, but that is what I love about you. I love you, my little one. I always will, and always have. I pull back from him, as I have just tasted his salty tears. He is crying. I have made you cry, my love, and it warms my heart to do so. I kiss away his tears, and he cries more, harder this time, letting out a loud sob. He does not speak, but he shakes his head at me, as if trying to say that I have failed him in some way. I am only giving you what you want, my love.

I must end this now. He is too... emotional for me. I hate making him cry, and yet, I love to watch him do so. I love everything about him; his pain, his happiness, his shame, and his hurt. Tonight my love, you will receive the only thing that I can give to you; death. I pull back my hand, the knife still in place, and I push into him, closing my eyes to the sound of his quiet scream. It's funny really, that you can say nothing at all, but make it sound as though you're screaming at the top of your lungs, and your voice has been multiplied ten fold.

Your warmth slips over my hand as I pull out and pulnge in again. You scream silently again, your voice echoing in my head. I can feel your pain, I can feel you blood as though it were me bleeding in the chair. I love you like this; helpless and needing. I need you like this, just for me, just like this for right now. It'll be over soon my love. Do not worry, I will be gone soon. You scream again, this time, your voice is real, and the name that comes from your lips rips my inside apart.

"Atemu!" You call for him, yet he cannot hear you. You plead for him, yet he cares not. Can't you see that I love you, Hikari? I love you, and I only want what is best for you. I know, I'm being a little selfish, but in the end, this is all for you. It's always for you, Ryou.

You're fading now, I can feel it in the way your mind fades from mine. I'm losing you, yet this thought makes me smile. You will be happy at last, my dear Hikari. Happiness is all that I wish for you, and I am giving you just that. I pick him up with the last of my strength and carry him up to his room and I lay him onto his bed. The knife is still in my blood stained hands, and I smiled down at him, and he looks up at me with... something in his eyes that I care not for. I do not wish for his saddness, only his happiness. I move into him once more, harder and faster this time, pulling another scream from his pink lips. I place my hand over his lips to silence him, and when I pull away, his lips are stained with that some red blood that stains my hands. I love it.

You're fading even faster now, as my hand moves within you, pulling the last strength from your limp body. Your lips move as if to say something, but you say not a word. I think you are finally realizing that I love you, and that this is for you, that I'm doing what the Pharaoh could not. He could not give you your freedom of me, he could only cause you pain. In order to help you my love, I must hurt you first. It's almost done now, I can feel my own heart beat starting to slow. You emerald eyes are misting over in pain as death comes for you. You look so beautiful like this, under me, under my hands, under my control.

I pull the knife back and drop it on the night table besides us. You are so close, I can feel it, and I cannot wait. My dear Hikari, I love you. And so, I tell you.

"Ryou, my dear dear sweet Ryou, I love you. With all my heart, I love you. I would never do anything to hurt you, but this was unavoidable. You said once that you hated me, and that all I did was cause you pain and riun your life. After hearing this from you, I knew what I had to do. The only way to make you happy, is for me to leave, and that is what I was going to do, just go out and kill myself, but I found that no matter how much blood I shed, I never died. I do this to myself, and never does my pulse faulter. My wrists could bleed out all of my blood, but I would never die, and that is not what you wished. You wanted me gone, and now, I am leaving, all for your happiness. I love you Ryou, and I always will. Good bye my sweet love." My last words come out as a whisper as I fall next to him, and his eyes are fading to a dark green. He turns his head to me and kisses me. This all, his movement and actions, surprise me. HE is kissing ME!

I am so surprised at his kiss that I do not notice that he has stopped moving. His lips are still against mine, and I pull back to look him over. That's it. He is gone. His beautiful green eyes look into my own red eyes, and I can see his hurt at what I have done to him.

But, don't you see my love, I have done this for you. I sigh and shake my head. He does not love me, that is why he cars not of what I've done for him. He does not care that I'm dying for him. He cars only of the Pharaoh, and that damned brat. Well, at least I wan't have to see them again, and they will never be able to touch my love's body again. I have made sure of this.

I take you in my arms and kiss you one last time. Death is calling me, and I answer him willingly. He takes my hand and leads me to my heaven, where you are sitting there, waiting for me. I can feel the last few beats of my heart as I let go, and they only say one thing to me...

I love you...

_fin_

please leave a review on the way out!

thanx for reading


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